Sebastian Zearing

how to be progressive without being a stupid liberal

Tag Archives: trp

Social Constructs and Social Wrappers

Gender is a social construct, they say. And race/ethnicity. And lots of other things that most people can stare at and say, “but but… these distinctions obviously exist and are real!” And they would be right, except that they’ve failed to understand what a construct is (though that may be the fault of either intentional or unintentional obfuscation on the part of the “social construct” advocates). I think the term “social construct” leads to these kinds of misunderstandings for two reasons. One, the word “construct” itself connotes “not real” even though it definitely doesn’t denote that (here’s where the obfuscation comes from). Two, the term doesn’t imply any kind of connection to something objectively real, even though there often may be an actual connection. The term as it’s most often used should be replaced with “social wrapper.” But what is being wrapped? Well here’s a list:

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Power Orientation

This post was originally published at therationalqueer.wordpress.com.

Power orientation is an aspect of one’s sexuality that is reminiscent of, yet decisively separate from, what is classically known as one’s sexual orientation. Sexual orientation demarcates the gender(s)/sex(es) one finds sexually arousing. Romantic orientation is also often bundled with sexual orientation, even though it relates to higher-level emotional arousal and attraction. Power orientation is, broadly, the degree to which one seeks to direct a sexual encounter. And just like sexual orientation, it can be paired with a higher-level orientation that relates to romance and pair-bonding, rather than just sex: one can enjoy (or be unaware that one might enjoy) directing or being directed in a relationship. Power orientation undoubtedly has many correlates, but the one most clearly bespoken by the gay community is penetration. Power orientation varies from dominant to submissive, where in the gay community dominant partners are very likely to be “tops” who are the insertive partners in anal sex and submissive partners are very likely to be “bottoms” who are the receptive partners in anal sex. Furthermore, an even larger portion of the gay population may very well be “versatile” and enjoy both aspects of penetration. (And of course some gay men refuse to engage in anal sex altogether.) Still, though the correlation between power orientation and penetration exists, they remain distinct things: one is a personality trait, the other a behavior.

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Normativity and Prescriptivism

This post was originally published at therationalqueer.wordpress.com.

In my exposure to the alttrp community (both on the subreddit and elswhere), I’ve felt that there is somewhat of an inclination towards using the red pill as a justification for determining the kinds of behaviors that gay or bisexual men should have. In other words, there is a sense that the red pill prescribes normative behaviors for gay and bisexual men.

I have absolutely no interest in determining or discussing what gay and bisexual men should do. If you want to claim that str8-acting behavior is superior or want to fem-shame, feel free to do so, but I will not waste time engaging with you. I fully appreciate anyone’s right to argue their point, but I think these discussions are frivolous, as I am much more interested in understanding homosexual SMP dynamics, how power dynamics compare and contrast with heterosexuals’, and other theoretical ideas.

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My Sexuality

This post was originally published at therationalqueer.wordpress.com.

As an exercise in full disclosure, I want to make sure my own sexuality is clear, so that the careful reader can understand and weigh the biases which I may bring to the table in my analyses, even against my sincerest efforts. I generally don’t identify with a sexuality. I don’t come out to new acquaintances with “I’m gay” or “I’m bi,” but rather make references to past boyfriends, LGBTQ groups I’ve belonged to, or just letting others come to their own conclusions based on observations of my social life and behavior. As a Kinsey 4-5, I find it difficult to label myself as gay, but bisexual doesn’t perfectly fit either. Instead of trying to label myself, I’ll stick to “queer” (which is the very essence of a non-label), and describe my attractions and history and let you come to your own conclusions. Note: I am male.

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The Red Pill for LGBTQs

This post was originally published at therationalqueer.wordpress.com.

As an individual who is both a red pill sympathizer and a queer man, I find myself in the almost unique position to subject non-heteronormative relations to red pill scrutiny. This subject has been on my mind for a while, but I haven’t had the time to start a blog until now (and if history is a guide, I will probably make two or three posts and then vanish for months!). It is obviously a play off of The Rational Male, to anyone familiar with the manosphere. Red pill concepts didn’t crystallize for me until I read Rollo’s blog, and despite some of his [mostly orthographic] shortcomings, I find him to be by far the most coherent and impactful of manosphere writers. Further, it’s actually a complete coincidence that I open this blog mere days after his Homosexuality post. Perhaps I should take that as an omen of good luck! At any rate, if you’re interested in these topics, please subscribe! …the posts are a-comin’.